Friendlessness

The bitter experience of the absence of friendship, leading to a sense of isolation and despair. It is often blamed on the faithlessness of others or even on God himself.

The experience of friendlessness

The darkness of being alone

Psalm 88:18 See also Psalm 88:8, Psalm 102:7, Psalm 142:4

You have removed my beloved and my friend; darkness is my closest companion.

Contempt and rejection

Psalm 31:11–12 See also Psalm 38:11

Among all my enemies I am a disgrace, and among my neighbors even more. I am dreaded by my friends — they flee when they see me on the street. I am forgotten like a dead man, out of mind. I am like a broken vessel.

Hatred and loathing

Job 19:13–19 See also Job 30:10

He has removed my brothers from me; my acquaintances have abandoned me. My kinsmen have failed me, and my friends have forgotten me. My guests and maidservants count me as a stranger; I am a foreigner in their sight. I call for my servant, but he does not answer, though I implore him with my own mouth. My breath is repulsive to my wife, and I am loathsome to my own family. Even little boys scorn me; when I appear, they deride me. All my best friends despise me, and those I love have turned against me.

Slander and conspiracy

Psalm 31:13 See also Jeremiah 20:10

For I hear the slander of many; there is terror on every side. They conspire against me and plot to take my life.

Examples of friendlessness

Elijah

1 Kings 19:10

“I have been very zealous for the LORD, the God of Hosts,” he replied, “but the Israelites have forsaken Your covenant, torn down Your altars, and killed Your prophets with the sword. I am the only one left, and they are seeking my life as well.”

Jesus Christ

Mark 14:50 See also Isaiah 53:3; Matthew 26:56; John 16:32

Then everyone deserted Him and fled.

The prodigal son

Luke 15:16

He longed to fill his belly with the pods the pigs were eating, but no one would give him a thing.

The lame man at the pool of Bethesda

John 5:7

“Sir,” the invalid replied, “I have no one to help me into the pool when the water is stirred. While I am on my way, someone else goes in before me.”

Paul

2 Timothy 4:16 See also 2 Timothy 4:10–11

At my first defense, no one stood with me, but everyone deserted me. May it not be charged against them.

The undesirability of friendlessness

Genesis 2:18; Ecclesiastes 4:9–12

The LORD God also said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make for him a suitable helper.”

Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor. For if one falls down, his companion can lift him up; but pity the one who falls without another to help him up! Again, if two lie down together, they will keep warm; but how can one keep warm alone? And though one may be overpowered, two can resist. Moreover, a cord of three strands is not quickly broken.

Cultivating true friends is the way to avoid friendlessness

1 Samuel 18:1; Psalm 119:63 See also Luke 16:19

After David had finished speaking with Saul, the souls of Jonathan and David were knit together, and Jonathan loved him as himself.

I am a friend to all who fear You, and to those who keep Your precepts.